Tuesday 2 July 2013

More Screwing

Here I am, as depicted by
Ms. Beatrix Potter,
courtesy of the Gutenberg Project.
Gosh guys, this owning your own screwdriver set malarkey is a total winner! 

I mean, the drawer fell down in my chest of drawers and when I checked out what was happening (other than my lace tops and décolletée numbers being all squashed up to the top and forcing the drawer out), I found a runner had fallen off and the drawer was just resting on top of another drawer. 

Well this is not very good, is it? But instead of having to hang around wringing my hands and going "Woe is me! what will become of my little décolletée numbers," and hoping some manly man would come along to make it all better, I rubbed my hands with glee at the prospect of getting out the li'l ole Stanley screwdriver set again. One of the screws had got lost and one was bent but no matter, I took the bent one off to the hardware shop for size comparison. 

"Two screws for my chest, please!" I said. 

Y'know, I personally think it is a bit rude to stare with your mouth open and drooling a bit at the icecream cone someone-else is carrying. (I was walking some piglets home and if they have an icecream, I think I should too, don't you?) I mean, I was holding the dripping icecream just in front of my cleavage and someone could easily get the wrong idea, isn't it? OK, true it was one of the new Apple Pie flavours brought out by the delectable Sidoli firm of Welsh Italian icecream makers, but still.  

Acksherly, my favourite Sidoli flavour is Turkish Delight. Ooh, that is so delish! You only get the taste for the first couple of licks, then your tongue is cold and it's just icecream but you remember the ambrosial sweetness. 

Anyway, anyway, they rootled in a box of old screws and stuff and found me two screws the right size which they gave me freebies! And now my chest is going in and out smooth as silk. Top dollar. 

No, you cannot have a lick of my icecream. 

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