Tuesday, 29 April 2014

No you do not look fat in that

From Stock Illustrations
Well it is Spring! so all my friends are anxsting about how much weight they think they have gained in the dank dark days of Winter. As you know, my advice is: 1) buy a new bra, 2) have fun, 3) get on your bike. Believe me, those cute li'l rolls of chub will disappear so fast you might even miss them. 

Today I went off (in a well-fitted half-cup bra) on my bike to get some wild garlic to make wild garlic pestou. By 10 am, I had had a good wander along the paths of wild garlic and many other flowers, picked sufficient leaves, flirted with a dad I bumped into and was home already. Job done! cuz the first bit of exercise you do in the Spring should be much too easy for you, and then you feel like doing it again the next day rather than aching in every limb and like you are too old now to bother. (That pestou was fantastically delish! BTW, and prolly very good for you, although no use if you are into diets as it is so yummy you do not want to stop eating it.)


I like getting out and about on my bike, but I am seriously not fussed about fat, sweet pea. ('Slong as it is not clinical obesity and bad for your .) Someone I have cause to be majorly grumpy with recently had her swimsuit delivered 'by mistake' to our address. At first I thought the little skimpy garment was for Piglet, but then I realised that although it is a teeny tiny size 8, it did have a teeny tiny bit of cloth let into it for very small boobs. I am glad for that person that she is teeny tiny slim, but personally I would much rather have cleavage <snerk>.

I do have a glamourous swimsuit, of course. However I get little chance to lounge about demonstrating how glamourously it matches a pair of glamourous earrings I happen to own in the same colour. Last time I wore it, I was shooting down a flume with my eyes screwed shut hoping I would not fly over the sides of the flume like a glamourous flying MILF, cuz when you are a MILF ... uh, I mean mom, you have to do these things, LOL.

I saw some summer pyjamas recently and I thought: 'Oooh, they are pretty, I wonder if someone could be persuaded to buy them for me,' and then I forgot about them. Then we were shopping for Piglet stuff in the emporium where they are to be found, and I thought:  'Mmm, perhaps I will try them on'. They did not have them in the size which I will probably be after I have bought a new bra and done more cycling than I do when it is wet, cold and I have a cough. I deliberated as to whether I should wait till I am slimmer. But then they will prolly not have the pyjamas any more at all at all. And the ones in the bigger size fitted comfortably. And I hate that feeling of: 'I must lose weight so as to get into this garment.' I just bought the bigger PJs. If I grow out of them, I can put a li'l tuck in the waistband. And I tell you what, they look lovely whatever.

I might need to feed up to stay large enough to keep the pyjama trousers up and not give the postman an unexpected treat in the mornings. Spring for me is not anyway the time of year to start a strict no-carbs diet (OK, no time of year is, LOL). It is Easter, and that means chocolate. At least Piglet has grown large enough now that the amount of chocolate she is given at this time of year is no longer the same as her body weight. However, she is likely still to need considerable assistance. I am not joking here! one year we had so much chocolate at Easter that I had to recycle it at Christmas by melting it down and spreading it on the Christmas biscuits. Ah, what we moms have to suffer! (wink). Mmm, pestou nomnomnom, mmm, chocolate mmmmmm.

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